Bottled water has lost its cool. It’s all over the news. Celebrities are saying it too.
Of course, you can’t go back to tap water. It’s disgusting. The government gets it from lakes, where fish live. And die. And have fish sex.
There’s got to be something better.
Introducing Tappe.
Start with a glass of pure, child-safe bottled water. Add one tablet of Tappe. Our patented flavor shards work their magic in just a few minutes. Once the bubbling stops, the water tastes like it came right out of your own tap. It’s that simple!
All that Costco bottled water you bought back when it wasn’t The Worst Possible Thing You Could Do To The Earth? Serve it with pride! One tablet of Tappe and that whiny Sierra Club volunteer at your door will think you drew it straight from your kitchen sink.
Tappe is available today in a range of flavors, from Colorado Springs (a tiny hint of gypsum) to Phoenix (butane, sewage, synthetic estrogen). Call us directly to request a Custom Flavor Profile: our agents will visit your house and assess your tap water’s complex character. Then we’ll create a tablet just for you.
Tappe: The safety of bottled. The taste of tap.™
