July 7th, 2014

liartownusa:

Country Recess Children’s Whiskey… Since 1889

"When the bells ring out and the doors swing open onto bright Spring sunshine, it’s time for Country Recess."

Reblogged from LiarTownUSA
July 5th, 2014

I tweeted something and then someone wrote it out in calligraphy and now all I want is a service that would render all my tweets this way.

I’d pay $20/month.

(Thanks @elgreg)
July 4th, 2014
Everybody knows the images of war in Saigon only from the newspaper. Nobody knows the atrocity. But everybody says: ‘Oh my God, how terrible!’ And this ‘Oh my God, how terrible!’ is just as real as the atrocity that happens there. It’s a different kind of atrocity.
Sigmar Polke, whose retrospective at MoMA right now is so fucking great
June 24th, 2014

First 10 Google Image Search Results for “Famous People”

Not pictured: 

#11 Hitler
#12 Elvis Presley

June 19th, 2014
A week from today! In San Francisco! Why don’t you come! It’s going to be good!

Tickets here.

A week from today! In San Francisco! Why don’t you come! It’s going to be good!

Tickets here.

June 3rd, 2014

Never check your phone while you’re dreaming…

May 24th, 2014

My Theme Song

I wrote a theme song for myself, for use in any typical theme song situation: when I’m walking on stage, or if I’m on a podcast, or if I’m hiding in my car from my family. Etc.

Hope you enjoy it!

May 21st, 2014

Whoa I think I found a typo on one of those new Oprah Starbucks coffee sleeves

April 25th, 2014

I’d love to read a book at a bar but every time I see someone doing that I’m like FUCK YOU NERD

April 19th, 2014

Salt Lake City Bar Conversation

Him: I hate it here.
Me: why don't you leave?
Him: Because I love it here.
April 15th, 2014
Now that we’ve established that poetry is work, let’s move on to questions of productivity. How much should a poet produce, ideally? As much as one half-assed garden, planted by a person with a drinking problem, who did not read the directions on the seed-packets very closely. Elizabeth Bishop only ever wrote one poem, a villanelle about an elk breaking up with her (“The Elk Breaks Up with Me”), and if I may say so she did very well with it. Wallace Stevens only wrote five poems, and every one of them was insured for one million dollars, like a famous pair of legs. The greatest living poet, Nicolas Cage, continues to amaze us by never having written a poem at all.
Patricia Lockwood is my hero.
January 14th, 2014

Hi please put this on my tombstone because nothing sums up my era, spirit, and sweet sweet style better than this.